Will you be there for me?

I am not sure if I did the correct thing.. If I ever give him enough time to think about it, will he come back to me or he would hurt me more, adding much more pain to my heart as now? What am I suppose to do in the first place? Why should I put everything regards to him ahead of me...



I longed for his care and concern for me, showered his love and pamper me as before but what did I get these few weeks? Days after days, weeks after weeks I have been looking forward to his message or call. When the times I need him most, where were he? The only thing I know was he was out there enjoying himself then to even drop me a message. Why should I still initiate to approach him for the answer, I feel so useless.
The next thing I know its, I am just merely a friend in his eyes. It hurts me more when I heard from his colleague then from his own mouth. .



Why is all these happening to me.. Aren't I suppose to let go of the man I love rather then let him suffer in my hand. Or is it I am too naive to think we could start all over again?



Tears keep flowing down but who cares? My tears can drop down anywhere that I can't even control.. Can I let him know? No way...This hurts much more then a year ago... It really hurts...



Baby, why are you telling me these white lies? Do you know it really hurts me a lot when I think back what you have done and said are totally different? Do you think that I feel good when you are not like before as well, where is my caring and loving dear I once had before? The times I missed you and when I need you, you are not by my side, you can't be there. I can do nothing at all as you say you are busy at work and tired and what I can do its not to let you worry about me, keep all things to myself eventually this is the ending I get. Did I do something wrong?



You say the feeling aren't the same as before, have you ever consider about my feeling as well? What am I to you? Right until this moment haven't I been more initiate then ever? My baby, where are you? Can you come back to me? I really need you to be my side... ...